Pay It Forward (or Maybe Just Make a Good Return)

Shewwwww! Today was quite a Monday. 

It's been a long day. 

I didn't start dinner until 9:30pm and turned it into a meatless Monday with veggie Spaghetti. I'm slurping away on the noodles as I type. However, this entry is not about food (or art or any event I attended). Coming off of a 2 week vacation, I was preparing for this to be just a hellish kind of Monday. But something miraculous happened. Someone did a good deed for me first thing this morning that really set the tone for the rest of my good Monday. Imagine that. 

A little background. 

I apparently have a neighbor who is handicapped/disabled or whatever the politically correct term is. You know what I'm saying. I've never met this neighbor, but he or she has a driver that picks them up each morning around the time I'm heading to work. This driver is an older friendly gentleman. He always waits in or by the van for them to be ready to go-reading, listening to the radio, stretching his legs, etc. He usually waves and/or says hello in a very friendly and non-threatening manner as I drive out of the neighborhood.  However, we've never held a conversation nor introduced ourselves to each other. Just a wave, a "hello" or "have a good day". That's all. For several months now. Almost every morning. 

I guess he'd noticed he hasn't been meeting me in the mornings over the holidays (yeah kinda scary to know someone you don't know knows your schedule). I digress. This morning, I went to my ice-covered car, started it and let it run with the heat while I fumbled around through my purse looking for my Ear Bags. I wanted to keep the wind out of my ears while I scraped the ice off my windows because it obviously wasn't going to melt fast enough. I should mention I'm not a morning person by any means. Before I could find them, I see a big white man seemingly lunging at me with a huge ice scraper. I'm sure I momentarily had a look of shock and fear on my face, but before I had the chance to be alarmed by this motion and reach for a box cutter (lucky him), he spoke out in that hearty voice I recognize each morning. "Do you need any help getting that ice off your car? I noticed you were just waiting and you're normally off on your way by now. Didn't know if you had an ice scraper or not". I did have one. An opportunity for him to retreat, but he did not. We introduced ourselves. Made small talk for a few minutes while he scraped one side and I scraped the other. A small gesture made my day. Between that and blasting Bruno Mars all the way to work (you're welcome to the couple that caught my all-in performance at the stoplight), there was no possible way I could have a bad Monday now. When I got to work, a co-worker made notice (knowing how I usually am in the mornings) saying "You act like you might be a morning person today!"  Funny how a little help from a stranger and the absence of people cutting you off and flipping you off in the morning can make all the difference. I'm sure he went about his day not thinking twice about what he did for me. But I did not forget.

I say all that to say this. For every genuinely nice person in the world out there, there's probably 5 unkind-troubled-soul-ready-to-do-you-harm type people out there. 

You watch the news. 

If we were all a little nicer, a little less on edge all the time, and had a sense of community reaching out to our neighbors BEFORE tragedies happen...well... it's quite possible avoidable tragedies would happen a little less. Just maybe.Think about how many people you flipped off in traffic today or had a nasty exchange then sent them on their way with all that built up hostility. How many people did you smile at and hold the door for? How many times did you say "thank you", "I love you","good job", or "need any help" to someone today? How many people did you treat like they're beneath you (because that's how you really feel)? You get the idea. Ponder that.

Now, should you choose to go up to a stranger with a sharp looking object (such as the ice scraper) like my friend this morning, let it be someone who is familiar with your face. Should you roll up on a defensive single woman such as myself, I don't want you to catch a box cutter to the groin trying to do a good deed. I'm suspicious of everyone I meet until I feel there's no threat. I suspect most women (and some men) are as well--especially in the south. You may come across a "shoot first and ask questions later" type of character. So please, exercise good judgement in your good deeds. If you think you don't have anything to pay forward, how about making the first deposit? 

I'll pay it forward I'm sure as I like to think of myself as one of those genuinely nice people in the world. I probably already have to someone in some way today not realizing it. However, in this day and time where in the blink of an eye blazing spotlights are shed all too often on the bad side of humanity (again...you watch the news), I think it's important to let others know how much you appreciate their everyday kindness-no matter how big or small. Kindness is kindness. It SHOULD be encouraged. So not only will I pay it forward, but I'm making a return. He's got a nice little handwritten Thank You card with his name on it and a bag of homemade fresh baked cookies waiting for him in the morning.

You can go the grand gesture route. That's always nice. But you know, it only takes a small amount of spice to liven up a dish. So adding spice to someone's day is just fine. You could hold the door  and share your umbrella in the rain with someone else who doesn't have one. Offer to take out your neighbors garbage. Share a laugh with those standing near you in a long line. Donate used books to a library in the name of your favorite teacher, student, or school staff member. Just a few ideas.

You know, it really is the little things.

-Until again-

"Never let loyalty and kindness leave you!
    Tie them around your neck as a reminder.
    Write them deep within your heart." -Proverbs 3:3 (NLT)